From time to time I begin to notice something...
I finally take (or force... or forced into) a full day off...
No working out... no alarm... Sleep until I wake up, make no plans (unless the plan is dinner... we have to eat), allow yourself to come down moment.
When I get this day... I find myself lost... not enough energy to figure out a Day Adventure... but not too little energy to go absolutely brain dead... I find myself somewhere in between.
I get places and forget why I'm there (why did I walk into this room?), I find myself driving to friend's homes and I have no idea why I'm going there... I'm walking around in a daze in malls (why did I drive to the mall?)... I graze my eating all day, snack by snack.
No care to get really dressed or do my hair or even care what I look like.... I'm punch drunk.
Punch drunk is a term used for boxers who've been hit in the head one to many times.
Ok a blow to the head... I can understand that... But what about the other blows? Aren't we taking them all the time.
So of course... I look this up...
A term used to describe someone behaving in a bewildered, confused, or dazed manner from having been physically, mentally or emotionally punched.
Well that makes more sense now...
When you walk around... day after day, moment after moment... And you are doing it all, aren't you also absorbing it all too?
Blow by blow, person by person, hour by hour, task by task... When does the "I look perfect everyday and have a #amazing life with all these amazing people, in this amazing place that I get to share with you all in my InstaStory! #blessed" end, and the reality kick in?
My punch drunk days remind me of just this....
I'm not a computer, but even that gets a snooze or over heats and needs a restart all the time.
My phone even lets me know when it needs some juice and has to go into "low-energy" mode.
Why is my body any different? Oh wait its not!
When you step up and step up, and then everyone gets to say "wow look at all you do" and you can't even remember why you're doing it... Don't you think a nap, or even day off is due?
I worked my little ass off so hard, and had seen myself pushing it a little too much... and when the moment came, I knew it... I had crossed my finish line, and the sleep was going to be epic.
And it was.
Great news is now... I do not shame myself for knowing I am about to go into a small coma and recoup.
Like a good party girl knows how to handle herself the next morning... I am a retired one who knows how to handle herself after her mortal combat energy level is dead. I'm in the red and my body is being knocked down by someone's spinning kicking thingy.
Thankfully its getting kicked into my bed.
Ok... What now?
We accept that we are human, that our body needs some loving, and we do the things we know we need to do to help it come all the way back up to say "sufficiently charged".
Sleep, shit tons of water, no plans, no demands, real food, real friends, comfy clothes, fresh shower, morning stretch, meditation... for me this is all the medicine I need to get back into fighting shape.
This isn't a hard thing to do, but we make it so sometimes.
(Can it be that easy? Yes, yes it can.)
You shame yourself for not doing enough and give yourself a huge to-do list on your day off, and you aren't enjoying anything because it needs to look that way to someone else?
Drop all the shit... turn off the noise, and make time for you. (What the fuck does anything else even matter if you can't even form full sentences?!)
Your body is begging for it! I'm more then sure.
This world has speed up a lot. Some countries still get it (Spain anyone... they take an entire MONTH off! Get it SPAIN!)... for some odd reason we don't.
Check this out... Even Oprah takes a full day off and does nothing. And if she does it... just sayin.
When you start to feel the Punch Drunk happening, and you're not enjoying yourself... Take the to-do list and shove it in the corner and take it all down 17 notches.
Turn your phone on "Do Not Disturb" and take care of you.
You're worth doing nothing for.
Yeah I said that.
All my love to you all,