Be Here Now
Ever hear this saying. Ya know the title of this one.
Of course you have... with the power of social media, there are tons of meme's waiting to be posted (maybe even on my own haha) supporting this idea.
But are you... Are you here, NOW!
I have a whole other blog I wrote, and it seemed "ready " to post. Yet for some reason, its making no sense to me why I wrote it, and where its going. (Its good don't get me wrong... but its missing something.)
Then it dawned on me...
Yesterday, at the end of my Barre class... I sat on the floor (as we always finish) and I don't remember what the quote being read to me actually said... but somewhere in there was "you are exactly where you're supposed to be" kinda mumbo jumbo... that I looked around after hearing it and thought... "Shit I'm on the floor in a Barre studio in my now sweaty Lulu's. Fuck, how did I get here?"
What was my morning even? Do I remember... because I think on my drive I wasn't paying attention to anything... not even my coffee... was I was making a list on what I needed to do that day? Did I think about who I needed to call back?
And while I was sweating my ass off and working hard... did I go into auto pilot because my muscle memory said "we got this?"
Wait a minute? Did you leave your one bedroom apartment in West Hollywood that you dreamt of having since you were a child, and drive in your beautiful car, to go to your Fancy workout run by the chick who you were in awe of from the moment you met her and now call a friend, to now be here and have your fancy yoga pants on and people asking you what you're doing cause you look so good in them... Did you just forget or rather get used to this being the norm?
How the fuck did you get here?
Ever stop and think about that??????????????
I've definitely have heard and know that gratitude is not an attitude... It's a practice.
Am I really practicing it... or am I now in a moment of expecting it?
And sometimes (when its all calm and going well, and the tribe has your back and the universe is making you look like a walking Champ) you are paying attention to what is right there, right now, in front of you.
I'm gonna go NO.
Not to say you are me, and I are you, and we even think alike... But what bothered me about the post that is all written and possibly too long to share and needs some more work on hahahah (this is me punking myself to post it soon)... What bothered me was the subject matter.
It was a huge chunk of my life where a shit ton of people where asking me to be somewhere I wasn't yet, and figure out things I hadn't been faced with yet to figure out....
I couldn't just BE THERE... I had to Be in the past or the future.
Cut to today... now we're in another fancy workout place, doing some hot yoga, on our fancy yoga matt, and our friend is teaching the class....
The quote read then: (I looked it up so I know what this one says)
“He said, "There are only two days in the year that nothing can be done. One is called yesterday and the other is called tomorrow, so today is the right day to love, believe, do and mostly live.”
OMG!!! No wonder I had such anxiety in the past. And no wonder that blog post that's in my drafts gives me pause to post.
I need to BE PRESENT, at all times.
Fuck what happened (we look back and we learn), and fuck what hasn't happened yet (worry is praying for a future you don't want)... what the fuck are you doing now!
Who's in front of you? What are they saying? What kind of tree is that? Have I ever seen that building before? Ya know, that shit.
OK... how do we put this into action ASAP, as the UNIY is yelling this at me.
Well... just do it silly.
Oh... its that easy haha.
Today... as I made food, helped a friend with an audition, walked to another friends home to help them out... I would stop my brain, look around, and take in each moment.
Whoa... I get to leave this Yoga Studio in Hollywood and drive back to my place. Wow, I remember when I saw this dude in a film and now he's at my home and he's my friend asking me for help... Dude this is my neighborhood that I get to walk around... Is that the MOON? Its huge tonight. The air is so beautiful, I'm so lucky I get to walk everywhere.
My God... my life is so much better when I stop thinking about EVERYTHING I HAVE to DO in order to check off some list that I have many laying around the house (you have them too) and start looking at the awesomeness that is happening right here and now.
Not the social media looking at what someone else is doing... Not the task list making while working out... and not the mindless eating and not giving thanks for the beautiful food that you are so lucky to eat.
(Side note... opened my fridge and saw that it was all Green... the lime, cucumber, avocado, kale, arugula, mint, cilantro... even the wine bottle is green!!!... and this tripped me out... a year ago, this would not be my fridge! And how dope is the color green)
Not a food Photographer btw!
Am I now the chick who works out every day and eats right and doesn't even think about it or stress how I can make the "right" changes???? What the fuck? (The wine will always be there who you kidding).
You hear it... "be here now" "be present" "be aggressive" (that's a cheerleader thing I got jokes) and you get a little too used to the gifts you have been given... so how do we switch out of auto mode and get into Here mode.
Your job now... and mine... when the auto pilot kicks on... stop, look around, listen, take in your life happening in this moment.
Let's expand on it too!!!!
List what you're so thankful for happening in that morning alone... Not all the shit you have to do later, or tomorrow... What cool stuff is here now. And no you don't need or have to write it down, just think about a couple things. (You'll never read that piece of paper you wrote your 5 things down on anyway.)
I promise promise promise you... The anxiety will melt away... and you might even be... SHOCKING I KNOW... thankful and grateful for all you have.
For me... this is no joke... I actually start to breathe better. It's like the weight is lifted off my chest and I'm here now and I go "damn... this feels so good! And ain't that a beautiful fucking day."
Give thanks, be present, and if anyone asks what you got going on... look around, count it up, and say "a whole fucking lot!"
Cause, duh, you do.
Go have a beautiful present filled fucking awesome day!
All my love to you all,